Warning: I Do Not Own Avengers. If I Did Wanda Maximoff would get 50,000 solo movies.
Hi, My name is Lena Foster, and I’m your ever so amazing narrator. I live at the amazing superhero group, the avengers, tower! I’m not one of them though, no matter how many times I ask . Something about me getting tired vacuuming the kitchen and me being squashed like a bug on a mission in two seconds flat. Okay, they have a point, but still!
Don’t worry if you don’t know the avengers, there’s only a few things you need to know. Tony Stark is Iron Man and goes around blasting things and being immature. Rhodey is War Machine and does… pretty much the same thing. Steve is Captain America, got frozen in some ice for seven decades, and woke up in 20th century. Natasha is Black Widow and goes around being really scary and intimidating. Wanda is Scarlet Witch and does the same thing as Natasha but is cooler because she actually has superpowers. Clint is Hawkeye and goes around shooting a bow and arrows. Bruce who gets mad, goes big and green and yells “HULK SMASH”. Sam is Falcon and goes around in mechanical bird wings. Peter is Spiderman and Tony fake son- I mean he’s Tony’s trainee. Vision, Tony A.I. put into the body of an Android. Thor, who’s the God of thunder with a hammer only he can lift. Loki is Thor’s adopted brother, God of Mischief and… well he’s not really an avenger but he tried to invade New York at one point because their father was a jerk, does that count? Oh well, it doesn’t matter. I think I got everyone. Well, there’s also Fury who goes around dressed like a pirate and bosses the avengers around. Hill, Fury’s sidekick. Pepper, Tony’s girlfriend who’s basically the boss around here. And Bucky, Steve’s metal armed friend who also was put in the ice, but instead got brainwashed by bad guys, and forced to kill a bunch of people, including Tony’s parents.
Anyways, back to the point, I love living with the avengers. And vice versa. They’re pretty much my only friends as most people think I’m a weirdo. Unfortunately, they’re also, how do you say it? The most mentally messed up people alive. While there are many things I love about them. There are a million more things that drive me to insanity. One example is schoolwork…
Once upon a time, long ago (Okay it might have been only last month) I had to do a project on Enthusiasm, Positivity, Diversity, Humanity, Freedom and… something else, what was it? I can’t remember. Anyways I had no idea what to do, so what was my very stupid idea? Just ask the avengers! I went to Steve first. He knows about this stuff right? He’s Captain America!
Big Mistake! At first he was just like “oh pfft l don’t know about this stuff and blah blah blah” BUT not even five minutes later he went into this seven hour long speech about it! Plus, it was so boring I fell asleep and I didn’t hear a single thing he said. So I still had no ideas!
My next mistake was Natasha. I thought she know something since she’s awesome, but I guess she was still mad about me putting pink dye in her shampoo and kept deliberately giving me dumb irrelevant ideas like “elephants” or “heaters” or “Compliment. What? Enthusiastic people give compliments don’t they?”.
Bucky was just like Natasha but his ideas were even worse and he wasn’t even doing it deliberately! Wanda kept pretending not to understand English simply to avoid answering. Vision was about to give a speech like Steve’s but luckily I managed to hit him over the head at the right time. Clint was as clueless as me. Sam, Pepper and Rhodey were too busy to help me. Peter’s idea was to do it on Mr Stark because “he’s the most awesome guy ever”. Bruce kept using a bunch of complicated words and when I failed to understand he got mad and hulked out. Thor did not understand what school projects were no matter how many time I explained it to him. Fury and Hill just kept pretending I wasn’t there.
So I resorted to my last option. Tony A.K.A. Iron Man. Usually, he would be the last person I would come to for anything at all. But it was either him or Loki, and from what I said about Loki in my introduction did you really think I was going to ask him? Moving on, Tony was surprising helpful, and promised to do the whole thing for me. I was happy I didn’t have to do anything and agreed, and went to bed that night happy and joyful. You see that this is going to end up badly, right?
So remember when I said Peter’s idea was “do a presentation on Mr Stark because he’s cool and I’m his fake son- TRAINEE” I need to stop making that mistake. Anyways, guess what? Peter wasn’t the only one with that idea, Tony had that idea too! When I came to see my project on the morning it was due, I came face to face with a five DAY- Not HOUR, DAY- long presentation about Anthony Edward Stark. When I yelled at him about it his excuse was “the project was about humanity and I have tons of humanity”.
And THAT is my ever so amazing story, I hope you enjoy and have incredible and wonderful rest of your day since I am NOT BECAUSE THE TEACHER MADE ME DO THE WHOLE PROJECT ALL OVER AGAIN! Honestly I really hate all of the avengers sometimes- Hey, I remember the sixth word! Bonding!
